I will do my best to catch up.
December 25. Such a great day. For the last 3 years, my ex come over in the AM and the kids open their presents. It wasn't always this way but over the years we have become better friends. It makes for a much better holiday.
After presents, we mae a huge breakfast and gorge ourselves as if it was the last breakfast. Great morning.
After the kids left to go to the ex's family Christmas, I decided to make a huge pot of coffee and settle in for a Sex and the City marathon. I LOVE Sex and The City and have probably seen every episode 5 times and I never get sick of it. It was shaping up to be such a fabulous day until that evening.
The pain started behind my eyes. I tried to ignore it but it progressively got worse. Within 2 hours I felt like my head would blow off. After taking a pharmacy of medications, my head was still exploding and now I was nauseated from taking too much Excedrin and Motrin. Not much sleep which only made the situation worse.
December 26:
Finally fell asleep about 5am only to wake up at 6am with the third world war being fought in my head. I dragged my ass to work were I barely survived. Thank God it was a light day so I was able to get to Urgent Care.
I was not only in pain but was so disappointed because I wanted to spend time with babygirl1 and hubby. I gave it my best shot but the fioronal was not kicking in very fast and I was miserable. I did sleep better which was a relief.
December 27:
I had to work again today and Babygirl1 and hubby had to go home. My work is on their way home so they stop to have lunch. I was definitely feeling better and we had a nice but short visit. I so miss her and my tears flowed heavily when she left.
After work, I had my 6th date with Mr. J. I know I have not posted much about him because I'm still not sure where this will actually go. We are having a great time together. He is fun to be around and he makes me laugh. Unfortunately, there is a little too much baggage for me. So unfortunate as I really do like him.
I have been honest with him and made my intentions clear. He knows, too, that he is not really ready for long term. And it's OK with me.
Clearly, this is a rebound relationship. Even though my last relationship ended 3 years ago, I still have not fully recovered. Yes, I have grown tremendously. I am much more stable, secure and Independant. I am happy with the woman I have become. yet, there is a small piece of me that still mourns my loss.
Mr J is in the middle of a messy divorce. He has been married 24 years and letting go of that kind of history is difficult. I have been there myself and We talk about the healing process frequently.
This relationship has got me thinking. A lot.
I have learned so much from my last relationship. I have learned to use my head AND my heart so I can see the red flags instead of rationalizing them away.
I am a cautious person and do not trust easily. Even though I blogged about how many dates should I wait until I jump into bed, I already knew the answer for myself and I obeyed my head and not my loins:)
I don't know how long this relationship will last. I had a dream the other night that he went back to his wife. In the dream, I was not angry but happy and relieved.
Maybe it's a sign.
